COUI - Teens & Toddlers inspires young people to get the skills, qualifications and self belief they need to succeed in education and life. Read how the experience of working with toddlers gave these three teenagers hope for their own lives, and the strength to overcome what seemed to be insurmountable difficulties.
LOUISE*
Louise is a 14-year-old black girl from Haringey and comes from a
family of eight children. She has a twin sister who just had her
second baby, and her older sister who is 19 has two babies and
lives in a women's hostel.
Her 20-year-old brother has six children. He has a violent nature and has previously torn off all the rooms' doors in the family home. Louise has scars on her face as a result of his violence. Her 15-year-old brother also has a violent nature and has been hitting and physically abusing her mother.
When the family expected social workers to visit, they made a great effort to tidy up and pretend everything was fine. Then shortly after, the violence would start again.
When she started the Teens & Toddlers programme (T&T), Louise was pregnant, but then chose to have a termination. During the first sessions, she would either be completely silent or would alternate between silence and being loud and verbally aggressive. T&T provided her with the role models she never had at home.
Her family had always hated social workers, but by the end of
the project, Louise wanted to become a social worker because she
could see and understand how they had tried to keep her safe.
IRENE*
Irene is a 15-year-old mixed race girl from Greenwich, in care with
the social services. Her father is in prison for attempting to kill
her; her brother is also in prison for murder and Irene's mother is
an alcoholic. At the age of 12, she was raped by a
distant family member. She has been sexually active since then and
has sexual relationships with different boys every month.
When Irene first attended T&T, she had a lot of anger issues. She did not trust anyone, and repeatedly tested staff by acting out and challenging them. (This is something many at-risk young people do - they test the authenticity of the people caring for them, and only accept their help once they have proven they respect and see potential in the teenagers.)
Irene saw a counsellor for a one-to-one session every week as well as doing T&T. She started to learn about her emotions, her triggers and how to control them.
Once the counsellor had passed her test", Irene starting engaging with T&T. In spite of her life at home, Irene had 100% attendance at the project. She worked extremely well in the nursery with small children, did an excellent mentoring job and passed her National Award.
REBECCA*
Rebecca suffered from an eating disorder and weighed 4.5 stones.
She lived with her grandparents, who were her guardians as her
mother had been declared "unfit" due to drug and alcohol abuse
problems. She had been diagnosed with attention deficit
hyperactivity disorder (ADHD); so she wanted to be the centre of
attention at all times and would not listen to anyone else.
Caring for small children at the T&T sessions really moved Rebecca. When she saw how vulnerable they were, she realised how vulnerable she was herself and developed a sense of self-compassion. She practised her new skills with the small groups of children she worked with, supporting them to talk one at a time and to listen to each other.
Her bold facial expressions captivated the children and her class teacher was full of enthusiasm and support. It moved Rebecca greatly when she realised that it was her presence that kept them interested and learning.
Rebecca's self-esteem increased, as did her hopes for the future, when she realised that she was good with children and that she enjoyed the responsibility of teaching. This prompted her to consider teaching as a career.
Seeing her skills, the Head of the Primary School offered her the opportunity of completing her work experience. For Rebecca, this was a big step in building her confidence and sense of who she is and what she wants from life.
Rebecca now weighs 8.5 stones.
*The real names of the teenagers have been changed to protect their
identities.
By Sima Varsani, Impetus pro bono expert.
Read more about our work with COUI - Teens & Toddlers and other lives being turned around by our charities and social enterprises.
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